Guess what today is! It’s 2-2-1-1. It’s not as cool as 1-1-1-1, but it’s still noteworthy. I figured it was the perfect day to get back to writing again.
I’m back “up” and feeling much better!!! You know what I’m going to start doing more often now? Saying Thank You. Starting right now, right here. Thank you girls (and guys) so much for the compassion you’ve shown me this past few days in form of encouragement, kind words and hugs. It seriously touched me and lifted me up. The Quarter-life crisis thing doesn’t sound real, until it is. I always thought it was something that happened to rich, white kids (forgive my prejudice?) right after graduation and it was over with. In my mind, it was a one-time experience.
I felt fortunate for not having experienced anything like that right after graduation. Now, I know that it’s something that comes in waves. And like waves, it eventually crashes on shore and it’s over. You hear that, self? A wave is not the end of the world! There may be other waves in the future. But, I feel more equipped to take them on, now that I know that it’s normal and that it’s temporary.
I just got frustrated with myself. I’m surrounded all day by people in their 30s, 40s and 50s who are great at their jobs. Next to them, I feel pretty inadequate. I get frustrated that I don’t handle situations like they do: cool, calm, collected, poised, wise and confident (read: NOT AWKWARD). It seems like every single day is a day to learn and learning often means mucking it up a couple of times. I get frustrated when people tell me “it’s just a matter of experience”. They’re right, but it doesn’t make me feel better. Learning is great, but the confusion it takes to get there is well…frustrating.